The Guardians of the Galaxy Porn Title Is a Thing of Beauty, in Case You Didn’t Guess That Was Happening

The true story of how baby Groot was made.
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We may have a few more years to go before we can finally go see the Guardians of the Galaxy sequel, but WoodRocket.com will make sure we have all the a-holes we can handle in the meantime with the porn parody Gnardians of the Galaxy: 50 Shades of Groot. You know you can’t wait to see Groot’s “I am Groot” face.

It’s hard to come by details at this point, but here’s what WoodRocket had to say in their press release:

Prepare to spread your orbs, whip out your infinity stones, and get hooked on a feeling, because WoodRocket.com is going into production on the Guardians of the Galaxy adult parody, Gnardians of the Galaxy: 50 Shades of Groot.

Being brought to you by the website that gave you Bob’s Boners, Game of Bones, and Orgy of Bill Murrays, Gnardians of the Galaxy: 50 Shades of Groot is looking like it could be the most entertaining genital-filled super hero team sex spoof of all time!

In honor of James Gunn’s Marvel movie masterpiece becoming the highest grossing film of 2014 domestically, and the recent announcement of the upcoming sequel, WoodRocket.com knew that now was the time to begin work on showing the world what real space genitals should look like.

Gnardians of the Galaxy: 50 Shades of Groot will be written & directed by Lee Roy Myers. “I think that Guardians of the Galaxy is one of the greatest super hero movies of all time. I am very excited to add penetration,” says Myers.

Good luck looking at this scene the same way ever again:

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(via io9)

Previously in porn parodies

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Dan Van Winkle
Dan Van Winkle (he) is an editor and manager who has been working in digital media since 2013, first at now-defunct Geekosystem (RIP), and then at The Mary Sue starting in 2014, specializing in gaming, science, and technology. Outside of his professional experience, he has been active in video game modding and development as a hobby for many years. He lives in North Carolina with Lisa Brown (his wife) and Liz Lemon (their dog), both of whom are the best, and you will regret challenging him at Smash Bros.