Wishing my beautiful daughter and her date a great time at prom #BadBoys pic.twitter.com/T5JRZQYq9e
— Jay Feely (@jayfeely) April 22, 2018
Former NFL player Jay Feely saw his daughter and her date off to prom with friendly gun photo a few days ago, an act that earned some criticism for a few reasons: some felt the gun seemed a bit insensitive at the current moment, and others cited that the common attitude and trope of the over-protective father tends to diminish the agency of young girls. Even as a joke, the idea that these “cute protectiveness” threats are normal or acceptable lead to a culture in which we don’t trust girls to make decisions about their own bodies.
Feely responded to the backlash by making it clear that his gun was not loaded, and that he’s friendly with his daughter’s boyfriend.
The prom picture I posted was obviously intended to be a joke. My Daughter has dated her boyfriend for over a year and they knew I was joking.
I take gun safety seriously (the gun was not loaded and had no clip in) and I did not intend to be insensitive to that important issue— Jay Feely (@jayfeely) April 22, 2018
Feely says he didn’t mean to appear insensitive, and there are plenty of posts going around on social media already saying the reaction is overblown. It’s probably important to note, though, that there’s a whole genre of these photos that display fathers being weirdly possessive of their daughters by holding guns toward their dates (just Google “gun prom dad” and you’ll see a bunch).
My point is, Dads clearly need some inspiration in the prom photo department, because this trend isn’t just sexist and potentially dangerous—it’s also cliché and boring. So for you Fun Parents out there, here are some things you can carry in your prom photos that are not guns, but still say you care.
- A dog! Dogs make every picture better, this is a scientific fact. Does not have to be your dog.
- Dyrnwyn, the powerful sword of Rhydderch Hael. If your daughter’s date is a worthy man, it will blaze with fire when he wields it. If it don’t burn, time to spurn.
- Oooh, some of those fun photo booth kits! They’ll probably have one at the actual prom, but the lines are always waaay too long. Grab a few and strike some silly poses!
- The lead arrow Eros used when Apollo insulted him, which will immediately instill a hatred more powerful than life in its victim.
- A fun DIY is to take an empty frame and incorporate it into your photos! Pinterest will bring up a bunch of these, and the extra bit of effort really shows.
- A strange light obscures your face every time you are photographed despite the fact that no one saw anything out of the ordinary when the actual photo was taken! How mysterious! Future generations will puzzle over this, and your immortality is secured as the light spreads each day with no clear reason!
Anyway, prom is a special night, and even if your daughter and her date never see each other again after high school graduation, the two of you will probably enjoy looking back at the photos in the future and fondly remembering this special moment. The best thing you can wear is … a smile! Smile, leave the gun out of the photo, remember that your daughter is not your property, and just enjoy the moment and love you have!
(image: Big Dot of Happiness)
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