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Microwave Math

For the sake of Remmy P (or whoever decided to troll Yahoo), I took the above question seriously and set out on a journalistic journey to the office microwave behind my desk and performed a series of tests. I gave Remmy P the benefit of the doubt. She deserved it, after all. Our microwave doesn’t have an “add 60 seconds” button, only an “add 30 seconds” button, which I laboriously had to press four times during one testing phase. Our microwave also doesn’t have an “add 1 minute” button, so I had to again laboriously press “time cook,” then type in the one minute’s worth of time. Now, after sufficient research (the results of which I scribbled down on a pad so I could check for mistakes) I have determined: Come on, yo. Although, I’m fully hoping that Remmy P’s microwave has some sort of wacky defect that actually returns the results she inquired about, and she’s never used another microwave to know that the rest of them work in the way that normal math dictates, rather than how she didn’t realize that minutes don’t count up to one hundred.

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