Nickelodeon Rebooting Voltron, Promoting It With Horrible Rap Song [Video]

I’ll bet you had no idea that Nickelodeon was rebooting Voltron, the other-other 1980s cartoon about robots (that wasn’t Transformers or GoBots). Neither did we. But it is debuting on NickToons on June 16. Excited? No? Well, maybe their promotional rap video, “Let’s Voltron!” will get you in the spirit! It’s not really about Voltron, but it’s by SwizzBeatz! Though judging by the video, it’s geared towards adolescent boys who draw Voltron in their notebooks and probably write fanfiction about it during social studies (Keith + Allura = 4eva). And exactly one old lady, who may or may not be just another adolescent boy in an old lady costume.

So, want to spend the next 43 seconds of your life wondering where the last 43 seconds of your life went? The video is after the jump!

But first, the synopsis. (Trust me, the video is totally worth the wait.) Voltron Force takes place seven years after the original series ended and will feature the original pilots: Keith, Allura, Lance, Hunk and Pidge plus three new cadets. Because adding kids to the mix is always a great idea.

Several years after the final battle between the Voltron Force and Prince Lotor, a new evil threatens the galaxy, and the universe is once again in need of its true defender…

… With the once-in-a-millennium opportunity to train alongside their heroes, these junior pilots will help unlock incredible new powers, discover secret origins, and fight to earn their role in the legendary Voltron Force!

And on that note, the focus tested marketing jumble you’ve been waiting for! Let’s do the Voltron!

Really, if you don’t want to do the Voltron, just substitute it for “The SpongeBob,” or “The Stimpy.” It will be pretty much the same song.

(NickToons via Topless Robot)

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Jamie Frevele