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Who Are The Three Witches In ‘The Rings of Power?’

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Okay, who invited these sus girls?

Like I’m literally about to drop out of school at Middle Earth. I’m done. We’ve already got that weird kid Adar running around who literally everyone thought was Sauron, and now we’ve got straight up witches crashing my parties? Like I thought that they would be cool, because honestly their white outfits are kinda sick, but all they did was stand in the corner and stare at everyone. Like they were looking for someone. But like, idk who? I mean maybe they were scoping the dance floor for hotties but they were doing it in the wrong way. Like no one is gonna like you if you just menace them. Honestly, I think they were probably looking for something else. I heard a rumor from one of my Elf friends that they’ve been trying to find that weird guy who fell out of the sky. Like apparently she saw them standing where the that dude fell, like they were tryna catch his magical vibe and track him down. She says one of them got on the ground and like … sniffed it. But idk she’s probably making that part up.

What’s even worse is that my Harfoot friend Nori Brandyfoot had a run in with them after class one day. They were trying to track down “The Stranger” and Nori was not having it. So all the other harfoots showed up to defend her, and guess what they did? They set their caravans on fire. LIKE WTF?? RUDE.

Apparently they have creepy-ass “not names.” The one in the armor is known as the Nomad and I’m like “good, so she can wander away and leave.” The one with the staff is called “The Dweller” and I’m like “she can dwell somewhere else.” The third on is called “The Ascetic” who’s really asce-ticking me off. Somebody needs to do something about these girls.

And I actually heard a rumor that someone did.

So apparently the witches actually caught up with The Stranger, because they heard a rumor that he was actually Sauron. So they immediately start like flirting with him being like “embrace your true power” blah blah blah and The Stranger was not impressed. So guess what he did? He turned them into BUTTERFLIES. LOL. I CAN’T. BYE BYE. FLY AWAY. It’s too funny, right? Like I know I used to think that The Stranger was old and weird, but honestly now I’m really … into him? Do you know if he’s single? I really want him to come to one of my parties now.

(Featured image: New Line Cinema)

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Sarah Fimm
Sarah Fimm (they/them) is actually nine choirs of biblically accurate angels crammed into one pair of $10 overalls. They have been writing articles for nerds on the internet for less than a year now. They really like anime. Like... REALLY like it. Like you know those annoying little kids that will only eat hotdogs and chicken fingers? They're like that... but with anime. It's starting to get sad.

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