I Do Declare! 86-Year-Old Great-Grandmother Has Written Her First Romance Novel.

Society tells people–particularly women–that after a certain age, we’re no longer allowed to be sexual beings. That’s a bummer of an expiration date to constantly loom over one’s heaving bosoms, but 86-year-old first-time author Georgia Gorringe is having none of it. The Great-Grandma recently published her first “steamy” romance novel under the pen name Georgie Marie, and you can take your Christian Grey and shove him: No Goodbye is the new socially acceptable erotic plane-read.

Gorringe told KUTV her novel is “about a bored housewife, and she listens to talk radio […] And that voice on the radio, oh, he had a magic voice! And it just turned her on!” Says Gorringe’s embarrassed daughter: “Sometimes I’m like, mother, how could you do that? How can you write that?” Here’s a longer synopsis from Amazon:

Sometimes, the sound of a voice is all it takes to dial up a fine romance. But can you really fall in love with someone when you have never been in the same room? No Good-Bye by Georgie Marie is the enthralling modern romance that may just prove that love can happen anywhere, even on the airwaves.

No Good-Bye by Georgie Marie tells the story of forty-something Gloria. An attractive woman with a passion for astrology and a domineering handyman husband, Gloria has found a romantic diversion she indulges in right in front of her husband. She simply tunes into talk radio show on the station KXYZ, and listens to the dulcet tones of the host Dr. Ben Carpenter. However, as the weeks go by, the temptation mounts.

The Great-Grandma has spent the last five years writing her magnum pornus, and when asked by KUTV if the novel was inspired by real-life events, replied: “I can’t tell on people. It’s all fiction.” Says her daughter: “I mean, we know who she’s talking about.”

(via Jezebel)

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