‘Poopy hands’: Trump’s pick for Secretary of Defense doesn’t believe in germs

Who would’ve thought that Donald Trump would pick a Secretary of Defense that, quite literally, has shitty hands?

Fox & Friends host Pete Hegseth will be Trump’s Secretary of Defense. While his statements are being picked apart by opposition, that’s not why Hegseth is trending. In an article from 2019, Hegseth claimed that he doesn’t believe in germs. “Germs are not a real thing. I can’t see them. Therefore, they aren’t real.” At the time, Hegseth also thought that he hadn’t washed his hands for ten whole years.

The internet immediately trolled Hegseth upon this discovery. Forget that Trump will give him the honor of serving as the Secretary of Defense. Unfortunately for Hegseth, he may be immortalized as the guy who actively fosters a microbiome on his hands. One Twitter user suggested that Hegseth’s Wikipedia page should be trolled. They wrote, “Get into edit mode and add “Poopy hands” to his list of accomplishments.”

This is the part where we all laugh

The internet is brutal—it also never forgets, which is why the clip of Hegseth resurfaced online. It’s no surprise that most social media users took this claim seriously. After all, Trump shortlisted vaccine skeptic Robert F. Kennedy Jr. as the head of the Department of Health and Human Services. Hegseth’s claim of disbelief in germs suddenly doesn’t feel like a joke, even if it should sound like one.

Thankfully, Hegseth was merely joking in the segment. He later clarified that the comment was a joke and that it was directed to people who were too worried about germs. “My half-hearted commentary to the point is, we live in a society where people walk around with bottles of Purell in their pockets, and they sanitize 19,000 times a day as if that’s going to save their lives.” Needless to say, the clarification was a silver lining to his appointment. It seems that diplomats from other countries wouldn’t be too worried about poopy hands anytime soon.