Ohhhh, those mean, terrible strikers! They’re putting these poor CEOs in a bind, they sure are! How selfish can you be, demanding that your body not be used in a Black Mirror-esque digital scanning scheme! Don’t these people know that the CEOs are ARTISTS, and they’re just trying to CREATE?
It’s a cruel, cruel world for businessmen. Capitalism has not been kind to these folks whatsoever. Thankfully, they’re taking a MUCH needed respite from the chaos of people demanding basic work rights! No, it’s not at Bohemian Grove (this time). It’s at Sunny Valley, for a weeklong “summer camp for billionaires”—yippee!
Nestled in picturesque Idaho, the Sun Valley Lodge hosts some of the world’s most money-loving people each summer for a pleasure-filled week of rest and relaxation. During this week, these industrious individuals get a chance to unwind from the day-to-day travails of juggling their hoards of gold coins in between threatening writers via Deadline articles. They may even get a chance to amass more gold coins, because the grind never stops when you’re at the top!
Now, us plebeians might think that, after all the recent backlash against AI and talk of workers’ rights within the tech and entertainment industries, these golden-assed gods might have abstained from their annual trip into the country and taken a sabbatical to straighten out their priorities instead. But why would they do that when it’s just so goddamn disturbing that people are (GASP) willing to strike for their rights? I mean, what kind of a world do we live in? Are we Americans, or are we French? Sacré bleu.
This isn’t to say that these people aren’t thinking about the plight of the modern worker, however. Even gods have consciences. For instance: David Zaslav, that one guy from Warner Bros. who Boston University really hates, cares SO much about the people he’s worked with that he’s still denying their Venmo requests while on vacation. D’aww!
It’s truly heartening to know that while the state of the entertainment industry has sunken to such despondent lows that actors and writers are striking together for the first time in nearly 60 years, the people at the top are taking some time to simply not give a shit. I mean, they’ll definitely probably have some productive conversations about how to rectify the problems they’ve created, right?
Yeah, definitely. Definitely. They definitely won’t just be screwing around, talking bullshit and unironically feeling themselves to songs like this:
(featured image: Kevin Dietsch, Getty Images)
Published: Jul 14, 2023 04:05 pm