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The 15 Best ‘Check Your Kid’s Halloween Candy’ Memes of 2022

Won't someone think of the children!?

Another year, another moral panic about poisoned Halloween candy. The myth that drug dealers are slipping expensive product into kids’ candy never seems to die—but it does always spawn a hilariously inspired collection of memes. This year, the “check your kid’s candy” meme, in which people claim to find outrageous items in Snickers bars and Skittles bags, got weirdly abstract. Here are the 15 best memes we found!

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Kuzco’s poison

Here’s a callback to the sorceress Yzma’s fiendish plot to kill Emperor Kuzco in The Emperor’s New Groove. Remember the poison? The poison for Kuzco? Kuzco’s poison?

Troll posts

Troll posts are annoying enough on Twitter, and now they’re in our candy!? Where will it end??

An invasive silver carp

Sometimes, when institutional PR accounts get involved in memes, the results can be cringey. In this case, though, the Oklahoma Dept. of Wildlife Conservation hit it out of the park.

The Carina Nebula

Earlier this year, space lovers got their first glimpse of the breathtaking Carina Nebula, thanks to the launch of the James Webb Space Telescope. But come on, did Carina really need to show up in our Twix bars? Not cool.

A negroni sbagliato

I’m still trying to wrap my head around the whole deal with negronis, but apparently they’ve gotten so popular thanks to House of the Dragon star Emma D’Arcy’s viral favorite drink moment that they’re showing up in trick or treat bags. No words.

Two wolves

Inside you, there are two wolves. There are also two wolves inside this candy bar.

An unpaid edit test

You know when you apply for a job, and they give you a huge assignment to do as part of the interview but you don’t get paid for all the time you spend on it? Well, check your kid’s candy. No one is safe.

A fedora with safari flaps

Fans of I Think You Should Leave starring Tim Robinson will immediately get this joke. If you’re not one of those fans, then scroll on. I think it’s great.

The two trees of Valinor

If you’re a Rings of Power fan, you’ll instantly recognize the mystical realm of Valinor. If not, you can keep scrolling to the next meme, because that show is fine but not great. There, I said it.

A fundraising ask

Just stop it, Nancy Pelosi! Stop it!! I can barely afford to pay for my Negroni sbagliatos, let alone your campaign!

A mimic

If you play Dungeons and Dragons, you know that you don’t want to encounter a mimic anywhere, let alone your Snickers bar. The nerve of these people.

New York Yankees third baseman Josh Donaldson

Don’t pimp that long drive unless you’re SURE it’s a homer! Otherwise you’ll end up in a Twix bar!

A turducken

Have these fiends no decency!? Who sneaks a delicious Thanksgiving meatpile into a poor, innocent child’s bag of wholesome treats?

https://twitter.com/blainecapatch/status/1579601192237559809?s=20&t=-5slMjvi-8F81fX4luMQmA

The One Ring

Okay, you don’t have to be a Rings of Power fan to know this reference. This is what happens when you let the Dark Lord Sauron rise to power. Lesson learned.

Hieronymus Bosch’s Garden of Earthly Delights

Yes, we saved the best for last. Unfortunately, the original tweet seems to have been deleted, but luckily numerous Twitter users saved the picture for posterity and then claimed credit for the idea. I love social media!

https://twitter.com/Jewyorican/status/1454636215626502145

Did you catch a good meme that we missed? Let us know in the comments!

(featured image: Getty Images)


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Image of Julia Glassman
Julia Glassman
Julia Glassman (she/her) holds an MFA from the Iowa Writers' Workshop, and has been covering feminism and media since 2007. As a staff writer for The Mary Sue, Julia covers Marvel movies, folk horror, sci fi and fantasy, film and TV, comics, and all things witchy. Under the pen name Asa West, she's the author of the popular zine 'Five Principles of Green Witchcraft' (Gods & Radicals Press). You can check out more of her writing at <a href="https://juliaglassman.carrd.co/">https://juliaglassman.carrd.co/.</a>