Today Marks the 20th Anniversary of the Most Disgusting Moment in Music History

There are things that happened in the past that you just can’t forget, no matter how hard you try. One of those moments turned 20 years old today and if I have to remember it happened, so do you! Sorry, those are the rules. Because this is just so gross. 

I am referring to Dave Matthews Band creating a poop river, obviously, and those poor people who got drenched in it while trying to enjoy a tour of Chicago. The band was crossing the river in their tour bus when someone emptied the septic tank. The issue being a tour group on a boat was right underneath it. 2004, what a time.

I have done this tour on the Chicago River and as I was on said tour, they reminded us all that this happened. So it is now my duty to remind you all about it on this, the 20th anniversary. Don’t worry, there are also plaques commemorating the event. 

“On the afternoon of Aug. 8, 2004, at this very location, the Dave Matthews Band tour bus emptied the septic tank over the Chicago River, drenching passengers on a boat tour with 800 pounds of poop. No one died that day but many wish they had,” a sign on the Kinzie Street Bridge reads. 

Imagine, if you will, just minding your own business, looking at the sites of Chicago, and promptly feeling 800 pounds of feces on you. You’d never be the same! And now, unfortunately this is a fact about Dave Matthews Band that I can never forget. Brings new meaning to “Crash Into Me” if you ask me.

Sorry for your poop nightmares

I am sure this was traumatic. I, personally, would never go back to Chicago if this happened. It made me hyper aware of every bridge we went under when I was there. I was not going to let myself be a victim of Dave Matthews Band! 

Is this why they did a cover of the song “Down By the River”? Were they referring to the time they poop attacked a bunch of tourists just trying to learn about Chicago’s rich history and the birthplace of America’s first serial killer, H.H. Holmes?

In all seriousness, this is why there are designated places for this kind of thing. So that people don’t risk death by poop when they are on a guided tour of the Windy City.  

So on this day, 20 years later, we remember those who were covered head to toe in Dave Matthews Band’s feces. I hope you smell something nicer than that today.