You bested the ancient demons of Dark Souls. You defeated the gibbering eldritch horrors of Bloodborne. Now prepare yourself for the greatest battle of all, the ten hardest bosses of Elden Ring, ranked.
10. Mohg, Lord of Blood
Some say Mohg, Lord of Blood is a foe easily vanquished. Some say that the boss can be “cheesed” by a skillful player with a clever build. Those players may haunt the Lands Between, but they are few and far between. For many a warrior, the dark skeleton wizard proved to be a worthy, throw-your-controller-through-the-TV adversary. For one thing is certain when fighting the Blood Lord. You. Will. Bleed. The entire boss fight is based around the bleed mechanic, one of the most unforgiving status effects in all of Elden Ring. He also can’t be parried. He grows stronger when fire magic is used against him. And he can regenerate his HP. He’s fully prepared to cheese YOU.
9. Commander Niall
Commander Niall is perfectly able to take you down all on his own with his lethal frost magic/lightning magic spear combo. But he’s a commander, and therefore decides to summon two subordinates to help him out in the fight. It’s totally unfair, as the best of Elden Ring battles are. The toughest thing about this fight is not its three-on-one nature, the Commander’s high attack power, or his impossible-to-read-as-a-foreign-road-sign moveset. It’s the LENGTH of this battle. The Commander’s high defense makes it so that your strongest blows merely chip away at his deep-end of a health pool. AND you have to worry about his assistants? It’s a battle of attrition were even the smallest slip up means death.
8. Astel, Natural Born of the Void
Bloodborne called; it wants its boss back. Astel is a horrifying cosmic entity from the stars, with a gross insect body and a freaky deaky human skull face. What horrors are writ in the heavens above? While many of the game’s bosses prefer to roll up their sleeves and pummel you into submission at close range, Astel prefers to sit back and drop more meteors than Madara Uchiha. Laser beams, lightning shockwaves, this boss is brutal at any range. And what’s that? You think magic will help? Trade long-range blow for long-range blow? NOPE. Astel ABSORBS magic attacks, so the only way to beat this monster is to get in close—a nigh-impossible task.
7. Crucible Knight Ordovis
An Ornstein and Smough of a new era. Crucible Knight Ordovis and his Crucible Knight bestie are a buddy comedy duo from the pits of the Abyss. And they’re the only ones who are going to be laughing. Defeat them one at a time? Right, sure. Sounds like a good strategy if they weren’t so damn quick. Ordovis is able to sprout a pair of wings and fly around the stage, while his friend keeps pummeling away at you. The pair is hard to pin down, but the near-constant flurry of attacks is certain to leave you struggling.
6. Dragonlord Placudisax
Oh, great. A giant two-headed floating dragon lord surrounded by a stage that drops one-hit-kill lightning bolts out of the sky. At least he looks kinda slow, right? He isn’t. This dragon can teleport. Easily the most stressful part of this battle is just trying to find where this draconic monstrosity even IS. And when you do find him, good luck. Placudisax has an arsenal of one-hit-kill attacks of his own, which he uses with extreme frequency. Thank the gods he’s so hard to find; this fight is not for the weak.
5. Radagan of the Golden Order/Elden Beast
Elden Ring‘s final boss Radagan is orders of magnitude less tough than the number one boss on this list, and that’s probably a good thing. Otherwise, no one would ever beat this game. That being said, Radagan is not to be trifled with. In his semi-human form, he can launch devastating AOE attacks, each capable of ending your entire career. After that, he transforms into the monstrous Elden Beast, and the AOE attacks become CONSTANT. To make matters worse, the Beast is constantly moving, making his little vulnerable glowing center that much harder to hit. Just no.
4. The Godskin Duo
The Godskin Duo. Why are they called that? Is it because their skin is so ungodly tough? Because they’re strong enough to skin gods and wear them? Or is it because they both possess the godly powers of resurrection? The answer is all of the above. The Godskin Duo is a merciless pair of baddies who simply refuse to die. They possess a shared health bar that must be depleted in order to defeat them. Kill one, and the other will simply resurrect it seconds later. That means that you have to soften both of them up and then kill them within a few moments of each other, or else the boss fight starts over.
3. Starscourge Radan
The real tough guy in this fight is Radan’s poor horse, who somehow manages to ferry the bulk of this monster on its poor little back. God’s best friend. Starscourge Radan is a menace. He starts off the battle chucking a barrage of spears and arrows at you from across the wide battlefield, and all you can do is dodge. Get in close, and he’s equally unforgiving. His twin great sword strikes have absurd range and damage, and his horsey allows him to move unexpectedly quickly around the battlefield. And just when you think you’ve got his moves figured out, he leaps into the air and turns into a damn meteor and dive bombs you. Broken.
2. Maliketh, the Black Blade
Maliketh, the Black Blade is responsible for dropping one of the coldest bars in all of Elden Ring. Anyone who says, “O, Death. Become my blade, once more,” is sure to be a creature that you don’t wanna mess around with. Maliketh is insultingly hard, with lightning-fast attacks and the ability to fly around the stage and assault you from all angles. And the worst part? The hits that don’t kill you actually reduce your maximum health, making it that much easier for the hits that do. He’s a boss that requires study. You can’t wing it. You MUST figure out his attack patterns or there is no hope.
1. Malenia, Blade of Miquella
Malenia, Blade of Miquella is HER. Thank the GODS this woman is optional, or else no one would beat this game. She tells you how hard she is from the jump: “I am Malenia, Blade of Miquella, and I have never known defeat.” And unlike her, you WILL know defeat. Malenia is by far the hardest boss that FromSoftware has ever created. Absurd strength. Blink and you’ll miss them attacks. She’s like fighting an anime protagonist. Broken. And guess what, she HEALS whenever she hits you, which she does A LOT. Got her to halfway health by some miracle? She transforms into a mushroom angel known as Malenia, Goddess of Rot, and proceeds to demolish your hopes with a flurry of Scarlet Rot AOE attacks. She is mother; she deserves fear and admiration alike.
Published: May 25, 2024 04:00 pm