I still hope ‘Agatha All Along’ isn’t queerbaiting me

I am LOVING Agatha All Along. I know that not all MCU fans love this witchy era, but I simply do not care. Honestly, I’ve enjoyed every piece of this series so far. Kathryn Hahn is spectacular. Her Agatha Harkness is cunning, spiteful, and downright bad, yet we also experience a deeper emotional side to her character, bringing humanity to this otherworldly show. 

Our introduction to Aubrey Plaza’s Rio Vidal certainly sparked tension with Hahn. There’s a queer energy here that leads me to believe there’s more sapphic intimacy still to come. Yet, I can’t help but worry that Agatha All Along won’t live up to all the queer Easter eggs it’s scattered. 

As a diehard Heartstopper fan, I think Joe Locke is the bee’s knees. I appreciate that his Marvel character, Teen, is gradually building quirks, and his backstory includes a boyfriend at home, wherever that may be. 

Is that enough, however?

Will Disney ruin it for us all?

Recently, Disney once again became mired in controversy when a report came out claiming the corporation’s higher-ups placed an indefinite hold on creating more queer characters due to backlash from Lightyear’s incredibly brief same-sex kiss. That at least explains the queer-baiting energy of Inside Out 2. 

It’s all so ridiculous because that sapphic moment in Lightyear is the most underwhelming minuscule kiss. It’s baffling to hear that such a tiny moment has caused Disney’s current backpedaling.

With the Marvel Cinematic Universe operating under Disney, it’s reasonable to assume the MCU’s producers are given executive-level notes requesting the studio’s content be made more palatable for a universal audience (they have merch to sell, after all!). That’s disappointing when you consider how great a metaphor the MCU could be for late-stage capitalism and neocolonialism. Yet, as we’ve seen in the last few projects to come from Marvel, their political critiques are at an all-time low.  

Long story short, I’m worried. I’m scared all the queer energy Agatha All Along is giving us is going to falter as the season goes on and we’ll end up with nothing. Will we meet Teen’s boyfriend on screen? Will Agatha Harkness and Rio Vadal solidify their electric chemistry with something tangible? 

The show’s most recent episode featured a yearning, almost kiss scene that stirred things inside me. It left me wanting more; it left me unsatisfied. I get that this tease added some queer sparkle to the show. However, I am only cautiously optimistic (emphasis on cautiously), especially considering what we’ve witnessed in the past … 

We deserve more from the MCU

So far in the MCU, we’ve had numerous characters who have been hinted at being queer but no concrete showcase of queerness. There was a massive media todo about a queer character being in Avengers: Endgame and everyone was speculating which hero it may be, and then it turned out to be one of the directors cosplaying as gay in a group therapy session led by Captain America. What the f*ck was that?!?!

We were told Valkyrie had a girlfriend who died in Thor: Ragnarok, but since then, there’s been no further confirmation of her sexual orientation. It’s been hinted that Valkyrie and Captain Marvel had some sort of relationship between Avengers: Endgame and The Marvels, but that may very well have been a platonic one.

Supposedly, all the Loki variants are genderfluid and pansexual; alas, have we seen this onscreen? For the most part in the Loki series, we saw Tom Hiddleston’s Loki pining after his female counterpart Sylvie, a Loki variant played by Sofia Di Martino—which hides the pansexual, genderfluid essence of his character behind the facade of a cis, heterosexual presenting relationship. In other words: pandering. The last openly gay superhero was Phastos in The Eternals, but I’m not sure fans recognize that movie as part of the MCU these days. 

After being let down so many times before, I’m scared that the outright queer vibes we’re getting from Agatha All Along are just smoke and mirrors and that the narrative will follow the same disappointing path as other MCU projects. 

In an ideal scenario, we would meet Teen’s boyfriend in person and see them hold hands, kiss, and skip away happily at the end of the series. Sadly, I highly doubt that will be the case. I think it’s more likely that Teen will have a villain arc or metamorphosis, which will leave him single and worse for wear from Agatha’s influence. Or worse, one of the gays will die. 

In an even more ideal scenario, Agatha and Rio make out on screen and live happily ever after in a dark cave on an isolated island. Alas, it seems unlikely. I would love to see some flashbacks of Agatha and Rio’s relationship. Unfortunately, a part of me believes we may only get one or two more lines exchanged between them and a brief history lesson from one of the other coven witches. Due to Disney’s alleged mandate, I don’t see these two women kissing on screen any time soon. The most we can probably hope for is prolonged eye contact and a cut to black. I really hope I’m wrong.

I’m still rooting for you to succeed, Agatha. Please don’t let me down. Let’s see some more gay stuff!