six tampons against a blue background
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Big on the Internet

Man Scandalized by “Obscene” Tweet About Tampons in 2021

We cordially invite you to get a grip.
Image of Chelsea Steiner
Chelsea Steiner
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Published: Jan 2, 2021 03:48 pm

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We are mere hours into 2021, but have no fear: a man on the internet already has opinions! British blowhard and Piers Morgan minus Adam Garrie has taken to Twitter to call out an obscene image. Is it gratuitous violence? No. Is it pornography? Guess again. Is it (gasp) a nipple?! Perish the thought.

Nope, the image that Garrie took umbrage with was a tampon. And not even a real tampon, an illustration of one! A singular white unused tampon was enough to send Mr. Garrie calling for the censors:

Garrie was responding to a tweet from the UK government’s treasury, which celebrates the abolishment of the tampon tax. It’s a political movement gaining steam around the world, as men are slowly coming to the realization that menstrual products are essential items, not luxury purchases. Ah yes, the luxury of not bleeding through your pants for 5 days every month. The opulence of shoving a dry wad of cotton up your vagina! What a lavish treat! Oh how we women are spoiled.

In a bizarre online rant, Garrie exclaimed that the image was obscene due to the “implication of bodily fluids” and the “particular curvature” of said tampon. Hmm, I wonder if he’d have the same objections to an image of toilet paper? How about the poop emoji? As for the curvature of the TAMPON STRING … well, add it to the endless list of curved objects that clearly represent womanhood. An orange? A girl. A basketball? A lady. A wheel? Basically a rolling vagina.

Garrie’s deranged tweet was seconded by fellow men who are terrified of menstruation in this, the year of our lord 2021. It was also lambasted by women from across the globe who are frankly, sick of their bullshit:

Twitter users also went to lengths to protect Garrie’s delicate man sensibilities by Photoshopping over the offending tampon:

I mean, Christ on a cracker, my dude. It’s just a drawing of a tampon. We cordially invite Garrie and his fellow brethren to take a seat and get a grip. After all, it’s only a tampon.

This is why we need comprehensive sex education … and way more women in elected office. Men are clearly too emotional and unstable to handle it.

(featured image: LOIC VENANCE/AFP via Getty Images)

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Author
Image of Chelsea Steiner
Chelsea Steiner
Chelsea was born and raised in New Orleans, which explains her affinity for cheesy grits and Britney Spears. An pop culture journalist since 2012, her work has appeared on Autostraddle, AfterEllen, and more. Her beats include queer popular culture, film, television, republican clownery, and the unwavering belief that 'The Long Kiss Goodnight' is the greatest movie ever made. She currently resides in sunny Los Angeles, with her husband, 2 sons, and one poorly behaved rescue dog. She is a former roller derby girl and a black belt in Judo, so she is not to be trifled with. She loves the word “Jewess” and wishes more people used it to describe her.
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