WASHINGTON, DC - JULY 04: First Lady Melania Trump attends an event on the South Lawn of the White House on July 04, 2020 in Washington, DC. President Trump is hosting a "Salute to America" celebration that includes flyovers by military aircraft and a large fireworks display. (Photo by Tasos Katopodis/Getty Images)

Melania Trump Unveils the New White House Rose Garden and Everyone Hates It

How do you solve a problem like Melania?
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Earlier this summer, First Lady Melania Trump announced plans to renovate the historic White House Rose Garden. While many first ladies throughout history have put their personal stamp on the grounds, few have chosen to do so during a global pandemic and economic collapse. Many considered Melania’s announcement to be wildly out of touch with the current climate, and began referring to her as “Melania Antoinette.”

Well, the renovations are now complete, and Melania showed off the new rose garden on social media:

Huh. Remind me, what did it look like before?

Goddamn it, Melania. So you removed all the colors, all the crabapple trees, and all the damn roses?! This garden looks like bouquet filler. The entire thing might as well be baby’s breath. But why did we expect anything else from the woman who brought us this Christmas decoration snuff film?

The rose garden is signature Melania: monochromatic, cold, and deeply unwelcoming. Most folks agreed, and #MelaniaRuinsEverything and #RoseGardenMassacre are now trending on Twitter. Let’s take a look at the hottest takes:

Realistically, we have MUCH bigger fish to fry with regards to the crimes the Trump family have committed. But still, this is yet another metaphor for how the Trumps have upended everything beautiful and good in this country. Just add it to the pile of things Joe and Kamala will have to fix in 2021.

(image: Tasos Katopodis/Getty Images)

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Chelsea Steiner
Chelsea was born and raised in New Orleans, which explains her affinity for cheesy grits and Britney Spears. An pop culture journalist since 2012, her work has appeared on Autostraddle, AfterEllen, and more. Her beats include queer popular culture, film, television, republican clownery, and the unwavering belief that 'The Long Kiss Goodnight' is the greatest movie ever made. She currently resides in sunny Los Angeles, with her husband, 2 sons, and one poorly behaved rescue dog. She is a former roller derby girl and a black belt in Judo, so she is not to be trifled with. She loves the word “Jewess” and wishes more people used it to describe her.