Stills from TikTok videos about Neurodivergent Nate
(@lacroix_goth/@grungyhealthgoth/@reganclemens0/TikTok)

TikTok is just starting to realize how problematic ‘Neurodivergent Nate’ is

A man who goes by “Neurodivergent Nate” online has come under fire after releasing a video arguing that women should not be offered paid maternity leave from their employers.

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Neurodivergent Nate boasts over 250k followers on TikTok and over 30k followers on Instagram. As his username suggests, he is neurodivergent and has been diagnosed with ADHD. He is currently pursuing his PhD in special education. On his channel, he often posts commentaries on parenting and education and is open about life as an adult with ADHD. Some of his takes are actually quite good, such as his commentary on the Cecily Bauchmann birthday candle mishap. Other videos raise awareness of things like accommodations that may be offered to neurodivergent students or employees.

Unfortunately, Neurodivergent Nate has repeatedly derailed his platform with problematic views. For a long time, his platform has focused heavily on attacking low-income parents and individuals who self-diagnose. Most recently, women seeking paid maternity leave were the latest group to draw his ire, leading to many TikTok users accusing him of misogyny.

What did Neurodivergent Nate say about maternity leave?

While Neurodivergent Nate has expressed more than one problematic view, his take on the topic of paid maternity leave is trending on TikTok. It started with him attacking a woman for posting about how she couldn’t afford to go on maternity leave because her job did not offer paid leave. When a commenter pointed out that employers should offer paid maternity leave, he responded by saying paid leave should “not be expected.” According to him, a company should not have to “absorb” a woman’s position and pay for her leave because she “decided to have a kid.”

He stated, “The company didn’t decide for you to have a kid. That’s a ‘you’ thing. It should not be the company’s responsibility.” Neurodivergent Nate also claimed that women should just find a male partner who is capable of providing for them for the six weeks of their leave instead of expecting help from their employer. Of course, it didn’t take long for numerous women to slam his video and point out all the ways he’s wrong.

For one, in this economy, it isn’t always plausible to expect one parent to be able to carry the financial load while the other is on parental leave. It’s also insulting, impractical, and, in some cases, unsafe to demand women remain financially dependent on a male partner. Not to mention the total erasure of queer couples happening with this take.

The United States is one of the only developed countries in the world with no official policy protecting an employee’s parental leave, whether paid or unpaid. The real problem is that the U.S. hasn’t made parental leave a right, not that some women are fighting for or “expecting” their company to offer parental leave.

On top of that, offering parental leave is a huge incentive to employees for whom employers are expected to do right by and care for. It also opens opportunities for people like recent college graduates to gain experience as temporary workers.

Then, there’s the fact that women are raising the next generation, and maternity leave has numerous benefits for both the mother and child, including significantly decreasing infant mortality rates. It’s unfathomable why anyone would be disgruntled at employers caring for the well-being of their employees. These women are valuable assets to their companies, so why wouldn’t that company repay them with a small benefit to ensure they can care for themselves and their newborn child without fearing going broke or losing their jobs?

@gabzilla.rawr

I cited only a few sources. It may be “opinion” that we shouldn’t expect maternity leave but dont the benefits for ALL outweight the feeling of self-righteousness? #maternityleave #latinamom #WORKINGmom #toddlermom

♬ original sound – gabi

Neurodivergent Nate has always been problematic

Although his maternity leave has earned him much negative attention, many TikTok users have pointed out that Neurodivergent Nate’s problematic views are not new. After all, one glance at his page will show that he has three videos pinned on his channel peddling the classist view he has built his platform on, which is that low-income individuals should not be allowed to reproduce. In the top video on his page, he lists a number of points he will vehemently defend, the first of which is, “Poor people shouldn’t be having children.”

The next two pinned videos are him discussing how low-income parents having children is “selfish” and makes them “trashy parents.” It’s especially strange that he touts these views while simultaneously denouncing things like paid maternity leave that would provide parents with financial stability while raising their children.

Nate believes we should punish those in poverty by denying them the right to reproduce instead of doing something more productive, like fixing the system that left them in poverty. He also doesn’t appear to understand that those in poverty often don’t have access to healthcare and contraceptives to help them prevent pregnancies. Also, what about parents who already have children but are thrust into poverty due to a job loss or other event out of their control? There are numerous reasons why someone who isn’t financially stable might have a child, and it’s really no one’s business what this reason is, especially since having a low income does not automatically make someone a bad parent.

@bpdjersey

@Neurodivergent Nate hey bud….. mimd youre goddamn buissness #greenscreenvideo MMentalHealthMMentalHealthAwarenessMMentalHealthMattersMMentalHealthSupportMMentalHealthAdvocateMMentalHealthRecoveryMMentalHealthStigmaMMentalHealthJourneyMMentalHealthCommunityMMentalHealthResourcesEEndTheStigmaBBreakTheStigmaSStopTheStigmaSStigmaFreeIItsOkayToNotBeOkayYYouAreNotAloneSSelfCareSSelfLoveMMindfulnessHHealingTTherapyCCounselingMMentalHealthDayMMentalHealthMonthMMentalHealthAwarenessMonthMMentalWellnessWWellBeingEEmotionalHealthPPsychologyBBPDBBorderlinePersonalityDisorderBBPDRecoveryBBPDWarriorBBPDStrugglesBBPDLifeBBPDCommunityBBPDsupportBBPDSurvivorBBPDAwarenessLLivingWithBPDBBorderlineStrongBBorderlineAwarenessBBPDHealingBBPDHopeBBPDDayBBPDSucksBBPDJourneyBBPDProblemsBBPDStigmaBBPDVoicesPDJersey

♬ Last Hope (Over Slowed + Reverb) – Steve Ralph
@lacroix_goth

And notice how happy and well adjusted my kid is despite being low income when I got pregnant. Its almost like calling poor parents “trashy parenting” is wrong? #fyp #fy #neurodivergentnate #trashyparenting #trashyparent #parent #mom #toddlermom #foryou #parenting

♬ original sound – Clare?

Neurodivergent Nate has also expressed transphobic views and attacked individuals who self-diagnose, even though fellow members of the neurodivergent community have stated there’s nothing wrong with people self-diagnosing so long as they respect those with official diagnoses.

Ultimately, he appears to have a strong dislike of mothers, low-income individuals, the LGBTQ+ community, and even fellow members of the neurodivergent community who have chosen a different path to diagnosis than him. He seems to believe his neurodivergence and work in special education make him a parental expert and give him the right to speak for the entire neurodivergent community. However, based on the reactions to his recent takes, he may begin learning that he can’t speak for the whole of the neurodivergent community, nor should he speak on behalf of parents whose situations and circumstances he may never understand.


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Rachel Ulatowski
Rachel Ulatowski is a Staff Writer for The Mary Sue, who frequently covers DC, Marvel, Star Wars, literature, and celebrity news. She has over three years of experience in the digital media and entertainment industry, and her works can also be found on Screen Rant, JustWatch, and Tell-Tale TV. She enjoys running, reading, snarking on YouTube personalities, and working on her future novel when she's not writing professionally. You can find more of her writing on Twitter at @RachelUlatowski.