No Musicians Want To Play at the Coronation of Diana’s Ex

The perennial prince until age 74, the soon-to-be-coronated king of the United Kingdom and the Commonwealth, Charles III, is just not having a very good reign so far. In addition to the widespread celebration at the news of his mother’s death, the multiple tell-all books and documentaries released by one of his sons, and of course, the constant showing-up in popularity by his long-deceased ex-wife, Charles’ team simply cannot find any cool celebrities to perform at his coronation concert! 

Many stars have claimed busy schedules as their excuse, but could it be that aligning themselves with the monarchy and an uncool colonizer like Charles could be more of a factor in becoming a social pariah than joining the mathletes into perpetuity?

The King apparently had a list of hit U.K. celebs he’d like to have on his team, but not everyone was keen. Of course, the goal in the oh-so-British event of crowning a king at Windsor Castle calls for the most British and most popular pop stars of the day. According to The Daily Mail, Ed Sheeran and Adele were the obvious first choices, but both were “unavailable” to perform. 

“The King has suggested a number of people he would like to perform and Adele and Ed were on that list,” a source told The Daily Mail. “He was very keen that they were part of the concert. There is a team set up to get the talent signed up but they were unavailable, which was a massive disappointment. They are titans of the showbiz industry and are quintessentially British but also known across the globe. It’s such a shame.”

Sheeran reportedly cited a scheduling conflict as his reason to stay away, since he has a concert in Texas the day before. But some fans have pointed out that a flight in a private jet would only take nine hours, making the coronation a tight but doable squeeze for the singer. Adele, on the other hand, gave no reason for declining.

Other famous Brits who reportedly declined invitations to perform for Charles’ big day include Harry Styles (don’t worry darling, we know you have your reasons), Elton John (um, his ex’s friend?), The Spice Girls, and Robbie Williams. Many of the naysaying artists gave “scheduling conflicts” or simply no answer as reasons for turning down an invitation to perform for the new king. However, PR experts are spinning a different yarn.

“For them right now, storytelling is really important,” a leading British music PR person, who asked to be anonymous, told Page Six about Adele and Styles. “These big symbolic associations carry a lot of weight and literally go down in history books in bold and underlined. I can understand why there’d be a big PR discussion around artists doing it or not.”

Does this remind anyone else of when Barack Obama got Beyoncé, Bruce Springsteen, U2, and all these amazing artists at his inauguration, and basically every living artist said no to Donald Trump, so he just had Toby Keith and, like, two other weird guys at his? Classic.