"This painting therapy is doing nothing for my daddy issues."

Orphan Black #CloneClub Recap: “Certain Agony of the Battlefield”

"Nut up, and lead me to the Cyclops."
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“This painting therapy is doing nothing for my daddy issues.”

Welcome to this week’s Orphan Black #CloneClub Recap! Episode 6 of the season, “Certain Agony of the Battlefield” gives us some answers about the Castors, as well as THE BEST SCENE THIS SHOW HAS EVER DELIVERED. EVER. Let’s dive in!

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Sarah’s having some strange dreams about Kira, Beth, and ultimately being hooked up to Rudy and getting his blood pumped into her. Well, that’s because she’s getting his blood pumped into her. Why? Well, because of her seemingly magic ability to be fertile despite most of the other Leda clones not being able to reproduce. Dr. Coady is giving her Rudy’s blood to test how she’s able to fight off the Castor’s illness when so many other women can’t.

"What do I know? I just work here."

“What do I know? I just work here.”

So many other women, you ask? Well, as Paul finds out (with an assist from Mark and the other doctor), Dr. Coady has gone rogue from the military. Whereas Paul’s only, genuine concern was curing the Castors, Dr. Coady wants to figure out this crazy clone STD and how to fight it in both men (their brains are affected) and women (their epithelial tissue is affected). Remember those creepy log books with women’s hair and details in them? Well Dr. Coady’s been sending the Castors out to sleep with women to infect them on purpose and keep records on it for baseline numbers. She just can’t resist the science. Why? Well, she wants to weaponize the disease. For whom? Well, for the military, apparently. Paul tries to report her to his higher-ups, but his higher-ups end up playing him, and in his attempt to free Sarah from the facility, he gets stabbed by Miller, kills Miller, then is shot and killed by Coady. That’s right, Paul is dead  – but he managed to take much of their science with him thanks to a handy-dandy grenade. Sadly, Dr. Coady and Rudy got away from the explosion. Oh, and Paul has always been in love with Sarah. *sad face*

Meanwhile, Helena was trying to get through the desert, but she was slowing down. Pupok tried to call her on it, berating her for wanting to go back for Sarah. Then Helena ATE PUPOK. She was hungry, after all. She then did go back for Sarah, finding her in the tunnels out of the facility after Paul had helped her escape and stayed behind to destroy Dr. Coady’s lab.

"How about you tell me where my sister is, and I won't turn you into an art project?"

“How about you tell me where my sister is, and I won’t turn you into an art project?”

Felix has been going crazy not knowing where Sarah is, and Mrs. S’ “people” being on it brings no comfort. When he brings Gracie in to Dyad to have Cosima check out her new illness, he convinces Scott to let him see Rachel, whom he proceeds to humiliate and threaten to extract any information about Sarah’s whereabouts. Meanwhile, Rachel is not in good shape, physically or emotionally. She begs Felix to get her “out of this place,” but Felix leaves her to cry and paint her paintings.

Cosima has been finding lots of comfort in new girl, Shay, but that doesn’t mean that Delphine is completely out of her system. When she shows up to work with Scott, Delphine is there – and she knows about Cosima having stolen Seth’s brain, and is supposedly there to “follow up” on the science. However, considering that she’s been SPYING ON COSIMA (remember that mysterious photographer during Cosima and Shay’s first meet-up? Yeah – sent by Delphine), it’s clear that she has ulterior motives for being around Cosima. Is it just Delphine being a jealous ex, or is it something more? And is Shay working for Dyad?

After the tense run-in between Felix and Rachel, Scott realizes that the strange symbols Rachel’s been painting into her paintings resemble paintings found in Professor Duncan’s cypher. Is Rachel the key to cracking the code?

MAKE IT RAIN.

MAKE IT RAIN.

And in the BEST (or at least, the most fun) storyline of the episode, Alison and Donny are absolutely REVELING in their new wealth, and the excitement of their new drug-dealing venture has totally ramped up their sex life (and set it to a hip-hop soundtrack). Now, they want to take things to “the next level,” which means that rather than buying extravagant gifts for themselves – like Donny does by buying an expensive car – they need a front through which they can launder money. So, Alison comes up with the perfect plan. She wants to buy her mother’s soap shop.

Donnie (KRISTIAN BRUUN) and Alison (TATIANA MASLANY)

I can’t with these two. I JUST CAN’T.

The Awesome:

  • Alison and Donny! Just everything about them in this episode, from their making it rain, to their sexually charged interactions, to their banter about the drug business (not to mention Donny being “savage jealous, Mrs. Hendrix.”). I love them so much in this episode. And I love that Donny is seemingly so turned on by Alison being so dominant. Tatiana Maslany and Kristian Bruun have awesome chemistry as Alison and Donny. They are perfection, and I want them to be together forever. I mean, JUST LOOK AT THEM:
Sometimes, you need to twerk upside-down.

Sometimes, you need to twerk upside-down.

  • Felix was amazing in this episode, too. I’ve always loved his relationship with Sarah, and so seeing him become proactive, and even a little unhinged, in trying to find her made perfect sense. This episode definitely took him out of one-note, Gay Best Friend territory and I loved that, not to mention Jordan Gavaris’ performance, which was beautiful this episode.
  • Paul surprised me in this episode. I’d always found him a bit milquetoast, but he really got a chance to shine in this episode, and become a fully-formed human being. You know, before he had to die. Still, I loved the way Dylan Bruce conveyed Paul’s genuine love for Sarah, and his desire to ultimately do right by her and his men.
  • Gracie didn’t have much to say or do this episode, but I’m enjoying watching her evolve as she learns more about the world outside her Prolethean home.
  • Helena eating Pupok. Symbolic, no?
  • Poor, poor Rachel. She may be moving up in my esteem just under Helena. Her story is so complicated and sad. All she, like Helena, wants is a family.
I just...I love them so much!

I just…I love them so much!

The Not-So-Awesome:

  • I really want Delphine to be up to something more than being jealous. Don’t get me wrong – I really enjoyed Cosima and Delphine together, and they clearly have real feelings for each other. But the Delphine spying on Cosima thing seems off to me. As much as I want Cosima to be able to breathe more easily without a constant Dyad plot against her, I also don’t want Delphine to be reduced to a spying wounded lover.
  • The Beth dream/encounter seemed odd and out of place. I suppose I get that Sarah would have some residual guilt about taking Beth’s identity (not to mention the love of her partner, Art, and that of Beth’s boyfriend, Paul, apparently). But she also didn’t know her well enough to have an actual attachment to her. It seemed weird to me that it would be Beth that Sarah would go back to on this sort-of vision quest.

That’s it for this week! Orphan Black airs Saturdays at 9PM EST on BBC America. If you missed last week’s recap, CHECK IT OUT HERE. Also, make sure you’re reading our Orphan Black Science Recaps, which walk you through the plausibility of the science of each episode! See you next Monday! And ’til then, stop asking why. Start asking who.

Oh, and one more thing:

I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!

I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!

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Author
Image of Teresa Jusino
Teresa Jusino
Teresa Jusino (she/her) is a native New Yorker and a proud Puerto Rican, Jewish, bisexual woman with ADHD. She's been writing professionally since 2010 and was a former TMS assistant editor from 2015-18. Now, she's back as a contributing writer. When not writing about pop culture, she's writing screenplays and is the creator of your future favorite genre show. Teresa lives in L.A. with her brilliant wife. Her other great loves include: Star Trek, The Last of Us, anything by Brian K. Vaughan, and her Level 5 android Paladin named Lal.