Best Prime Day Furniture Deals (Top 13 Picks)

Word on the street is you like sitting down. Laying on stuff. Putting things on top of other things. Making your house feel like a home. I got just the sort of thing for an interior degenerate like you … sweet Prime Day furniture deals.

1. ChooChoo Farmhouse Console Table

Let’s start of simple, shall we? With a nice table. The ChooChoo Farmhouse Console Table, to be specific. Sure, it’s not a dinner table. Not even worthy of a breakfast nook. But a lover of all things interior like you doesn’t judge. There’s a place for it. A place for all pieces of furniture, both great and small. Stick it by your door and drop your keys and wallet on it (so you don’t lose them anymore). Put some pictures of Pop Pop on there. Get creative.

2. Allewie Queen Size Metal Platform Bed Frame 

Did you make the mistake of bringing a cutie home in college only to have them laugh in your face when they saw your frameless bed? With the Allewie Queen Size Metal Platform Bed Frame no one will EVER dare shame you again. Your floor mattress has become an airborne mattress, the peak of sexy sophistication. Invite someone over and then turn them out on their heel, they’re not good enough for this bed frame.

3. Walker Edison Alden Versatile 4 Door Framed-Storage-Sideboard

Nothing says “storage” like a Walker Edison Alden Versatile 4 Door Framed-Storage-Sideboard. Just imagine all the things you can put in there! 4 door frames? 62 inches long!? MADE OF BIRCH!? It may as well be rich mahogany with all the value you’ll get out of putting your knickknacks in there. I mean, this thing is long enough to store a human body! Ahem. Not that’d you’d ever … need … that?

4. Allewie Queen Size Lift Up Storage Bed

Speaking of storing human bodies, the Allewie Queen Size Lift Up Storage Bed is the perfect bedroom accessory for all things murder! This luxurious bed lifts high into the air, revealing a spacious murder hole beneath! Just think of all the corpses you could store! And the police would never suspect a thing!

5. Kitchen Pantry with Rattan Doors

I don’t even know what exactly what “rattan” is, but this Kitchen Pantry with Rattan Doors is peak interior design. I’m sure you’ll appreciate the rattan used in the making of it. A furniture lover like you is just rattan to the core, aren’t you? And the rest is made from oak? Mmmm I smell the forest from here.

6. FDW Patio Furniture Set

Are you one of those people that likes to entertain? Of course you are. And with your brand new FDW Patio Furniture Set, no one will ever be ever to say that your back patio is boring again! Take a little gander at the many different types of furniture present. Chairs, sofas, and tables. Oh my.

7. Grand patio 5-Piece Outdoor Furniture Set

But what if four pieces of patio furniture just aren’t enough? What if the Joneses next door added an extra piece to their set? You gotta keep up, dammit. How better to do so than with the Grand patio 5-Piece Outdoor Furniture Set? You can seat a whole other person! Except for a Jones, they aren’t invited over.

8. ovios Patio Furniture Set

The Patio Wars continue with the ovios Patio Furniture Set. Who will win the patio war? With these hardy all weather rattan pieces of furniture engineering, I don’t see how you could lose. In war, what wins battles is more firepower. You’ve got a five piece furniture set ready for rain, sleet, snow and hail. That’s an arsenal if I’ve ever seen one.

9. HONBAY Convertible Sectional Sofa

Sit your hon-bae down on this HONBAY Convertible Sectional Sofa. They’ll love you for it. Why? There are so many different ways you can sit! You can sit upright. You can sit/lay on the long cushion at the end. Or you can fully lay on all the cushions at once! I guess laying isn’t technically sitting, but what hon-bae doesn’t know won’t hurt them.

10. Wood Burning Fire Pits with Grill & Lid

So you’ve won the Patio Wars. The Joneses were the ones who just couldn’t keep up. How are you gonna celebrate? With this Wood Burning Fire Pit with Grill & Lid. In case it wasn’t clear, this thing has a grill AND a lid, meaning that you can roast marshmallows, steaks, or the tender flesh of your enemies.

11. Criss Cross Chair

You ever get sick of sitting with your feet on the floor? Same. But regular office chairs don’t have the width to support horizontal leg action. With the Criss Cross Chair, you can sit criss cross with all the support you need. And it has no wheels, so you can’t topple over like you did in your other chair with no legs out to break your precipitous fall.

12. Y- STOP Hammock Chair

Y stop now? The Y- STOP Hammock Chair might be the best looking piece of furniture on this list. Just look at that luxuriously goth design, replete with fun little tassels! And that spongey seat? Perfect for sinking into the darkness of sleep. And best part? It has POCKETS. Put a book in there! A spooky magical grimoire! Whatever your witchy little heart desires!

13. 6 Tier Tree Bookshelf

This 6 Tier Tree Bookshelf is GOD tier. Look at that design! It’s functional. It’s convenient. And it looks like the sword that the Divine Dragon boss uses in Sekiro. You can stick more than just books on it! There’s space for knick knacks! A speaker at the bottom! And video games like Sekiro! Or you could just take all the books off of it and stare at it from across the room, hoping that that the Divine Dragon from Sekiro will appear to grab it and do battle against you. When that moment comes (and it surely will) the money you saved from your Prime Day deal will leave you just enough left over to buy a sword. Hopefully. You’ll need it.