What’s there to explain? Hello Kitty herself wrestled control from Starbucks CEO Brian Niccol in a hostile corporate takeover, just another stepping stone on the little cat’s path towards world domination via capitalism. Wait, that isn’t what happened? Hang on.
What is the Starbucks ‘Hello Kitty’ drink?
The Starbucks Hello Kitty drink is Starbucks’ newest addition to their infinitely expanding custom coffee roster. We’re long past the days of the rule of Pumpkin Spice—a new drink dynasty is emerging. This is the beginning of Hello Kitty’s reign. The Hello Kitty Starbucks takeover isn’t just one drink. It’s MULTIPLE Hello Kitty items.
Customers can now get three different Hello Kitty beverages. What do they taste like? Hello Kitty’s favorite food, of course—apple pie. The Apple Pie Cream Frappuccino is topped with a Hello Kitty-style bow, so you know exactly who’s in charge at Starbucks now. As if this coffee takeover wasn’t enough, Hello Kitty has also commissioned two teas to bear her likeness. The Red Apple Frozen Tea and the Zen Clouds Oolong Tea were both personally approved by Kitty herself.
In her infinite wisdom, Kitty has also decided that Starbucks’ mermaid-branded vessels must be obliterated. Starbucks is now selling Hello Kitty branded cups, thermoses, and mugs bearing both her image and the image of her second in command, her teddy bear Tiny Chum. Tiny Chum also happens to be Kitty’s chief disciplinary officer. If Starbucks’ higher-ups should for any reason attempt to regain control of the brand, they will be dealt with severely.
Where can I buy the ‘Hello Kitty’ Starbucks drinks?
The Starbucks Hello Kitty drinks are currently only available in limited markets. Per Starbucks’ official press release, customers in countries such as Australia, Brunei, Cambodia, India, Indonesia, South Korea, Malaysia, New Zealand, Philippines, Singapore, Thailand, Taiwan, and Vietnam can purchase this adorable treat. Available from September 10 while stock lasts.
Published: Oct 6, 2024 05:39 am