Oh, Everyone Is Thirsty for Tim Burton’s ‘Attack of the Fifty Foot Woman’

First, there was Lady Dimitrescu. Then there was Karlach. Now, we’re reaching brand new heights in thirst for tall women. News broke yesterday that Tim Burton is working on a retelling of Attack of the Fifty Foot Woman, and now, social media users only have one response: Mommy, step on me please.

Insert pleading emoji here.

This isn’t the first time Attack of the Fifty Foot Woman has been remade or reimagined in some shape or form. Until now, HBO’s Attack of the 50 Ft. Woman with Daryl Hannah was the closest we ever came to a proper remake that followed the original film in themes and approach. Most other reimaginings were low budget productions emphasizing the sex appeal of, well, a giant woman not wearing much clothes.

But with Burton directing and Gone Girl’s Gillian Flynn serving as writer, this is the highest profile remake in the movie’s history. The two have the chance to really push the original’s story forward, updating it for a contemporary audience—and with all the special effects a decent budget allows

Gaze upon the giantess thirst for Attack of the Fifty Foot Woman

I have no doubt the public will eat this movie right up, given the internet has been on a thirst-driven rampage over Burton’s Attack of the Fifty Foot Woman for the past 24 hours. From the very moment @DiscussingFilm tweeted about the production, Twitter users collectively shared sentiments that can best be described as “i think i hauve covid.”

Many pointed out that they’re badly attracted to giant women, who, to be clear, are a common kink trope in movies, TV, and cartoons today. One could argue the concept has become fetish fuel at this point. Seriously, don’t underestimate the amount of people who want to get stepped on by a giant woman.

Case in point, some people have zero chill in the @DiscussingFilm Twitter account’s replies.

My, things have changed since 1958. And not just in terms of special effects.

Is this a giantess kink in the wild?

So, why is everyone horny for Attack of the Fifty Foot Woman? Certainly, the original film always had some sex appeal for its power fantasy. A giant woman, out for revenge? Kinky. But I suspect the 1950s B-movie’s sexual fetishism was more subtextual, especially given its titular giantess isn’t 50 feet tall for very long in the film. In other words, people liked the film because it’s about a woman first, and a giantess second.

Today, the pendulum has shifted in a far more overtly kinky direction. The people crave the film specifically because it’s about a giant woman. They like the fact she’s a powerful woman. A dominant woman. A woman who could destroy a whole city if she wanted to, just like the poster. The kinky subtext is now text, and people find its fetish factor fun.

Don’t take my word for it. The data shows people are dying to spend their money on this exact concept. Adult website Clips4Sale announced in December 2023 that its top fetish for the year was “giantess” content, with a jump in sales by 36 percent. In a press release obtained by The Mary Sue, a Clips4Sale spokesperson pointed toward the ways “women have taken up increasing space in the cultural imaginary” as “public debates have raged over masculinity and femininity, alphas and betas.”

“The fetishization of giant women is a sign of the times. The giantess is at once sexualized and feared, more of everything you desire but at the same time able to consume you,” spokesperson Avery Martin said. “Creator culture has magnified the gap between the creator and consumer. It’s easy to feel insignificant to a powerful creator worshiped by thousands of other fans, so it’s not surprising to see the power imbalance eroticized. The giantess is the perfect embodiment of cultural mood.”

Then there’s simple fact that social media users have grown increasingly “horny on main” over the past few years, thanks in no smart part to the destigmatization of social media thirstiness with the pandemic’s “quarantine horniness.” Four years later, are people more open-minded about fetishism? Are they more open to expressing their attraction to dominant and powerful women? Are they experimenting more with kink, power dynamics, and the various fantasies these create? Or has the giantess’ appeal been hiding in plain sight all this time, hidden away until a moment of gender anxiety in pop culture?

Honestly, I think it’s a little bit of all three, although I’m inclined to believe the giantess is like the dominatrix—a prominent figure with widespread appeal throughout the ages, regardless of the cultural context. We see her everywhere, from Aphrodite in Homer to the Great Fairies in The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom. Call her a sexual archetype if you will. I’m sure Joseph Campbell would love that.

Anyway, it’s fascinating watching the internet grow undeniably horny for whatever Burton and Flynn are cooking up. My favorite response, though, isn’t a thirsty tweet, but a cinematic one. A Twitter user pointed to a scene from Shin Ultraman, where analyst Hiroko Asami briefly turned into a giantess. The level of detail and immersion in that moment is breathtaking. If this is what modern cinema is capable of, we’re about to eat real good at the box office.

Or not. Burton and Flynn could totally screw this up, especially given Burton’s last few films haven’t fared well with most critics. Either way, I expect the internet will have a collective meltdown whenever Attack of the Fifty Foot Woman gets its first teaser trailer.

(feature image: Allied Artists Pictures Corporation)