We are halfway through Wynonna Earp’s first season, and IMHO this was the best episode to date. That certainly bodes well for the rest of the season, as the show has more than found its footing and is busy kicking ass and taking names. Also kicking ass is Wynonna (per usual), who kills a Revenant who was about to attack Doc’s winter campsite. Why Doc is sleeping outside in the snow is anyone’s guess, but the frozen rocky ground is doing nothing for his disposition. He’s also starting to realize that helping Wynonna is bringing him a whole lot of trouble. (That and also his feelings are probably hurt that Wynonna just wants to be friends. Oh well, dude.)
The Blacksmith, who recently bonded Waverly to the son of the Stone Witch’s skull (modern relationships are complicated), is holed up in her shop. With a shotgun in her hands and a salt circle to protect her, she greets her unwelcome guest. Constance Clootie arrives with two burly bodyguards and a bone to pick with The Blacksmith. She wants to know where her son’s skull is. At first she tries to offer youth and beauty to The Blacksmith, playing in to her vanity, but the Blacksmith doesn’t budge. When Constance offers to cure her breast tumor, The Blacksmith takes a brief moment of pause. It’s short-lived, because The Blacksmith tosses a spell that scratches Constance’s face, and it’s no more Ms. Nice Witch.
At Shorty’s, Waverly and Wynonna are hanging with the Stone Witch’s son’s skull, like it’s no big deal. Wynonna is a little bummed that Doc is being distant, but she’s got a Revenant to track down so it’s off to see Dolls. Waverly has a bachelorette party to attend.
Wynonna and Dolls set about to figure out who the mysterious seventh Revenant may be, and discover a clue. Looks like he’s holding a playing card. A spade. Cluetastic! Dolls heads off to order some Chinese food for the two of them, and is even a little flirtatious with Wynonna. Hmmm. I’m not complaining.
After torturing The Blacksmith for hours, it’s finally a spell of extreme thirst that brings her out of the circle and right into Constance’s clutches. Oh Blacksmith, make like Wilson Phillips and hold on, girl!
At the homestead, Waverly is adorably trying to cute up the dilapidated house and singing and dancing like an angel. We truly don’t deserve you, Waverly. She’s interrupted by Doc, who wants to take a closer look at her skull-friend. The skull, which has an extra set of scary teeth, prompts Doc to warn Waverly about keeping Skully to herself. He then admits he was kind of a douche to Wynonna, and is adorably startled by Waverly’s cell phone. Her friends are on their way, and Waverly is feeling the need to have a little normalcy in her life, something Doc says isn’t really possible when you are a part-time bartender, full-time demon hunter. While Doc may not be invited to the party, he is invited to move on to the Earp land. That way they can all help protect each other. ADORABLE!
While researching spades, Wynonna gets a call from Dolls, who is being escorted out of Purgatory by some serious looking dudes. He tells her he has faith she can break the curse without him, but he gives no clue as to where he’s going.
Waverly’s guests arrive, well only two of them, and we instantly find out that most of her friends are the worst. People are freaked out about her house and bailed on the party, which hurts Waverly’s feelings. She does have an evil witch after her, so maybe they’re on to something.
Confused and a little pissed off, Wynonna finds Officer Nicole Haught chilling at her desk. (HAUGHT RETURNS) As Wynonna downs some Varmit whiskey, Haught mentions the party that neither of them were invited to. Ah hell no.
At the party, the bride to be, Steph, manages to judge every little thing about Waverly, from her relationship with Wynonna, to breaking up with Champ, to her discount pillows. This awkwardness is thankfully derailed when Doc shows up at the door, bearing fire wood.
Wynonna shares her whiskey with Haught, as they complain about Waverly’s friends and Haught compliments Wynonna’s ass in the most polite and adorable way.
(via)
See, while we can all appreciate Wynonna’s assets, the only Earp that has stolen Haught’s heart is Waverly. She all but tells Wynonna that too, but Wynonna is distracted by an open case file. There’s been three unexplained murders recently, and when Wynonna’s nose starts bleeding upon viewing the picture of one of the victims, she knows there’s Revenant badness all over this case.
The engagement party has turned out to be a real dud, and Steph isn’t afraid to say so as they passive aggressively play poker. Thankfully, Doc speaks up in his Doc way for Waverly and even cheats so she can win their round. A loud noise startles them all, and Doc heads out to investigate outside. Inside the barn, Doc finds The Blacksmith. She’s nearly dead but dragged herself there to warn Waverly that Constance knows she has the skull. She agrees to tell Doc how to kill Constance, but only as long as he promises to get Waverly to safety. After giving him the tools, The Blacksmith dies. When Waverly approaches the barn, Doc emerges and promptly breaks his word to the Blacksmith about whisking Waverly away. His desire for revenge is simply too strong. They head back in to continue their game.
Wynonna and Haught make their way to the morgue, where the murder victim bears an uncanny resemblance to Wynonna herself.  Dr. Reggie, the medical examiner, who likes to eat liquorice while surrounded by the stench of death, surprises them. How nice. He tells the women about how the victim died, and it’s pretty gruesome. She had her organs removed while she was still alive, and whatever was used to cut her was laser hot. Wynonna’s thoughts turn to hellfire, and she knows a few folks who’d be capable of that. Wynonna notices a small mark on the victim’s neck in the shape of a spade, and suddenly this case gets all the more creepy. Loud footsteps make it obvious that they are no longer alone, so Wynonna and Haught rush off to investigate the cooler where the mystery person is headed. When they return to the victim, they find her eyes pried open and a Jack of Spades card, shoved in her mouth. Wynonna’s nose starts to bleed, and it’s confirmation that a Revenant is to blame for this murder.
Back at Waverly’s, Steph is getting bored. As she’s about to go outside for a smoke with Doc, one of Constance’s goons is at the door, pretending to be a deliveryman. She assumes he’s a stripper, and the guy plays along for a minute so he can get closer to Waverly. The clock strikes midnight (the witching hour) and things get serious real fast. Outside, Doc aims his guns at the newly arrived Constance, but she sacrifices another goon to absorb the shots. Inside, the stripper goon lifts Waverly by the neck, demanding the skull. Thankfully, Waverly has a trusty pair of scissors on her person, so she stabs the guy in the head just as Doc runs in, gun drawn. In the midst of the chaos, their other friends Chrissy has gone missing.
Somewhere in an underground garage or secret lair, Dolls waits for debriefing by his superior, Agent Lucado. She’s not happy with Dolls’ lack of progress, or at least evidence of progress, and intends to remove him from his post and ship him off somewhere else. Dolls protests, but Lucado isn’t interested in his so-called new evidence.
Wynonna is desperate for a drink, and Haught is desperate for answers. She knows some seriously wacky shit has been happening in Purgatory, and somehow, Wynonna is always connected. Wynonna doesn’t like being questioned, and insults Haught’s knowledge and rookie status. She even goes so far as to ask if Haught is packing a deck of creepy playing cards. Wynonna mistakes Haught’s interest in Waverly as possibly suspicious, but Haught isn’t playing this game. She knows something fishy is going on, so she storms out.
Outside of the homestead, Constance appears wearing her finest gold lamé robe. She unleashes some chants. Inside, Doc tells Waverly what his connection to Constance is, and how he was released from the well when Wynonna left a rope hanging. Steph is freaking out, as this is a lot more than she bargained for on her bachelorette party. Waverly finally loses it and admits that what Steph and her old friends say about the Earp girls is true. They are totally messed up and embroiled in something totally bizarre. Now kindly move aside Steph so Waverly can grind some salt to keep out the witch. Too bad that salt won’t work for the ZOMBIES Constance has resurrected, that are already in the house. It takes a few gunshots, but Doc and Waverly get the stripper goon outside. It clicks in for Waverly that Constance is trying to resurrect her sons as well, which is why she needs the skull. It’s all too much for Steph, who runs out the door and is immediately killed by a zombie goon. Constance summons a whole gang of zombies, including the newly dead Steph, so Doc and Waverly retreat back inside.
Wynonna calls Dolls and leaves him a desperate voicemail about the shit going down in Purgatory. There’s not much time to mope, though, because she gets a call from Waverly summoning her to the homestead for backup. Doc sends Waverly upstairs to find any supplies to fight off the zombies, while he stays downstairs ready for a fight. Waverly heads up to Willa’s old room, which is exactly the way she left it all those years ago. She’s surprised by Chrissy, who has been hiding in the closet all this time. Chrissy gives her friend a much needed pep talk about how smart and brave she’s always been, and never afraid of a fight. That gives Waverly a very dangerous idea as she pulls the skull out of its hiding place. She sneaks outside to confront Constance.
Waverly tells Constance about being bound to the skull and demands to know why Constance did what she did to Doc. It all circles back to Wyatt Earp. Wyatt cared for Doc, and Wyatt was the one who killed her sons. It was payback. Also, her sons? Not exactly human. Yikes. Constance warns Waverly of a far greater evil descending upon Purgatory. She threatens to kill Waverly if she doesn’t hand over the skull, but Waverly does the unexpected and smashes it against the barn. Constance cries out in agony and rage, but Wynonna shows up before she can do any major damage to Waverly. Doc shoots Constance in the shoulder, which breaks the zombie spell, but Constance disappears from their site and drives off in her pink Cadillac. Wynonna comforts Waverly, who is nursing an injured hand and Waverly shoots a look at Doc, saying they have unfinished business.
Inside, Doc tries to explain his actions, but Waverly doesn’t appreciate being used as bait for his century old revenge fantasy. He tells he that he will come clean to Wynonna, and she confronts him about his feelings for her sister. Doc scoffs at her suggestion that he loves Wynonna, and his lying about his feelings only ticks Waverly off even more.
In the cold light of day, Haught wants answers about all the craziness happening in Purgatory and Wynonna is finally ready to tell her. They head off to grab some pancakes so Wynonna can spill on a full stomach. Haught can’t help but gaze at Waverly, who gives her a shy wave. Haught smiles, and so does Waverly, and methinks love is in the air.
After waiting for 8 hours, Lucado finally gives Dolls a chance to talk again. He offers up something that he says is better than any Revenant. A real one of a kind. Lucado is all ears and I’m pretty sure Dolls is planning on turning Doc over to the Black Badges.
Speaking of Doc, he’s been nursing a sore shoulder all night and he finds a bullet wound in the exact spot he shot Contance. Well ain’t that a kick in the pants? He also finds Haught’s cruiser, driving down a lonely road by itself, covered in blood.
He knows something very bad has happened to our brave ladies of the law.
Dana Piccoli is a pop culture critic and entertainment writer who recently relocated from New York to Greenville, SC. She’s a current writer and former Staff Editor of AfterEllen and covers The 100 for Alloy Entertainment. She’s also written for Curve Magazine, Go Magazine, PopWrapped, and Gaygamer.net. She’s currently writing a lesbian romance novel she’s hoping you will read one day soon. You can follow her on Twitter and Tumblr.
—The Mary Sue has a strict comment policy that forbids, but is not limited to, personal insults toward anyone, hate speech, and trolling.—
Follow The Mary Sue on Twitter, Facebook, Tumblr, Pinterest, & Google+.
Published: May 19, 2016 02:55 pm